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* Self Improvement and Personal Growth Weekly Newsletter *
Issue # 618, Week of July 12-13, 2010
Publisher: David Riklan - http://www.SelfGrowth.com
In this issue:
-- Quotes of the Week
-- Recommended Resource of the Week
-- Article: How to Think Positive Without Thinking it Will Jinx You - By Charles F. Glassman
-- Article: Self-Improvement - 8 Keys to More Happiness in Your Life - By Sylvie Strong
-- Book Review: It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff - By Peter Walsh
-- Brief News of the World
-- How to Subscribe and Unsubscribe from this Newsletter
Current Subscribers - 283,890 subscribers
Removal instructions are listed at the end of the newsletter.
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*** Quotes of the Week ***
------------------------------------------------------------ No matter how much pressure you feel at work, if you could find ways to relax for at least five minutes every hour, you'd be more productive. - Dr. Joyce Brothers, 1928-present You can't build a reputation on what you are going to do. - Henry Ford, 1863-1947 In taking revenge, a man is but even with his enemy; but in passing it over, he is superior. - Sir Francis Bacon, 1561-1626
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*** Recommended Resource of the Week ***
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* Shhhhhh... The Secret Lost Footage! * The 20 minutes the producers didn't want you to see...
and why! The secret of The Secret revealed. This deleted footage was the original inspiration for the movie and the book, and is essential for getting "the secret" to work for YOU. I've seen it and studied it. Join me, Rick Schaefer, M.D., and learn the truth about this lost footage! |  |
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*** Article: How to Think Positive Without Thinking it Will Jinx You - By Charles
F. Glassman ***
------------------------------------------------------------ The automatic brain always defaults to the worst-case scenario. This is an automatic, evolutionary instinct developed, over a few hundred thousand years, to protect us from pain and suffering--in other words, from the worst-case scenario of any situation. A few hundred thousand years seems like a very long time. So let's see how this has played out in terms of our lifetime. The Yiddish term, kinehora means "curse in reverse." For example, you might say, "Wow, I really did great in that interview! I'm sure I'll get that job." Someone who hears this might reply, "Kinehora" (unless, of course, they were going for the same position!). Kinehora is supposed to reverse the chance of the worst-case scenario from occurring--and cancel out the negative that will surely happen when you are so confident and optimistic. The Spanish word ojalá conveys a similar wish, as does knocking on wood. Many of us have become quite savvy to this law of the automatic brain (AB) universe--that since good inevitably leads to bad, then one should take a negative position first in order for a positive outcome to occur later. You see this with baseball fans who declare, "He's a sure out," secretly hoping that their negative talk will somehow cause their team's player to hit the game-winning home run. (Come on, I know you do this. You can't fool this Boston Red Sox fan!) Or football fans who, when their team's opponent is going for a field goal, say, "He never misses." Or, if their team is kicking, "He always chokes." The "reverse jinx" is very familiar to us sports aficionados! The other day, a patient mentioned that as a boy the laughing, playing, and general noisemaking from him and his siblings sometimes prompted his mom to warn, "Too much laugh turns to cry!" It's another example of that powerful tendency of the protective AB: Default to the negative, the worst-case scenario, to better prepare us for when that proverbial other shoe will drop. Believing, trusting, and taking direction from such a negative urging certainly will not make us better prepared for even the worst-case scenario. Still, it can be very easy to believe that the happiness we currently enjoy might be making us more vulnerable and therefore open for bad things to come. My patient's mother helped shape her children's ABs by exposing the nefarious workings of her own AB. Her AB's message to her kids: If you are happy and things are going well, something is bound to make you cry. Good things actually appear dangerous to the AB and therefore trigger it. Triggering this primitive brain leads us to fight or flee the good to protect us from the perceived grave danger. But do you feel better armed against actual danger when you flee to where this brain leads you? Are you more protected when your AB's default switch automatically flips to the negative and gets you to focus on the negative? Does that protect you from the things that could actually hurt you and make you more vulnerable? It often seems that our schools focus on students' weaknesses, rather than playing up their strengths. The aphorism uttered by many educators--"You can be anything you want to be!"--is not really honest. When I was younger I wanted to be in the Olympics. Although I loved sports and was a pretty fast runner, there was never a chance that I would be good enough to compete in the Olympics. Our AB directs us to look at those who are strong in areas in which we are not, and we end up trying to live up to an impossible standard. (Another principle of the AB is not to be outdone by anyone else.) The aphorism would be more accurate if stated, "You can achieve your goals if you identify your individual strengths and persevere to build on them." When you focus on your strengths, you see that even your weaknesses--which have probably defined you all your life--are not really weaknesses at all. I've often said that vulnerability is my greatest asset. I used to think that my greatest weakness was my robust AB. But it has turned into a huge asset for me, as well as for others who have followed my messages. Another of my supposed weaknesses--wanting to be a doctor (my high school advisor suggested I not try for this field)--eventually became a major strength. To nurture your mind, stop your AB from draining your true potential. Realize that all self-deprecating thoughts are generated by your AB to fight or flee a fake danger. The default to the negative will slow once you begin to embrace your strengths and stop looking at others to measure yourself and how your life should be. Obsessing on the news nurtures your AB and reinforces brain drain. The recent natural disaster in Haiti has created more data to which your AB will turn, now and in the future, to drag you away from good things. How dare you be happy when so many people are suffering? To nurture your mind and unleash your true potential and, for some, connect with spirituality, do not dwell on the news of this tragedy. Continue to live your life in a happy, mindful way and I guarantee you that the news you need to hear will come to you. You will be better prepared to act in a way that is right for you and right for others (including the victims of this horrific tragedy). So this week, think about how your AB defaults to negative areas when things are going well. Understand that what is good, what makes you happy, what inspires confidence is not dangerous. Resist looking to others' strengths, but instead recognize your own. Focus on your special, unique, individual qualities. You have them--everyone does, just as everyone has an automatic brain and a mind. If you are feeling good and your AB directs you to watch the news because you want to be more sensitive to another's pain, realize that you will be more sensitive to that pain by not watching the news. And when you're watching TV sports, try not believing that you have the power to negatively or positively influence the outcome of the game by switching the channel at a crucial point). By doing this you will have taken one step closer to stopping your personal brain drain. ** To comment on this article or to read comments about this article, go here.
About the Author:
Dr. Glassman is the author of the critically acclaimed book, Brain Drain - the definitive guide to connecting mind, body, and spirit. With his book, private practice, internet radio show, public appearances, weekly message and newsletter, hundreds of articles, and Coach MD, Dr. Glassman can show you what he has shown thousands of others: how to live a healthier, successful, and more abundant life.
Get started now with a free weekly message and chapters from Brain Drain at http://www.CharlesGlassmanMD.com * Shhhhhh... The Secret Lost Footage! * The 20 minutes the producers didn't want you to see...
and why! The secret of The Secret revealed. This deleted footage was the original inspiration for the movie and the book, and is essential for getting "the secret" to work for YOU. I've seen it and studied it. Join me, Rick Schaefer, M.D., and learn the truth about this lost footage! | | ------------------------------------------------------------
*** Article: Self-Improvement - 8 Keys to More Happiness in Your Life - By Sylvie Strong ***
------------------------------------------------------------ Do you feel like you are in a rut? In our fast-paced society, it is easy to feel dissatisfied with what life offers. Consider these important tips for self-improvement and you will make more out of your time and your life. 1. Happiness Begins With Your Body
Focus on a healthy body first. Get plenty of sleep. 8 hours if you can spare it. If you cannot get 8 hours every night, go to town on a weekend night and go to bed without setting your alarm for the morning. Have a nice set of blackout blinds in your room so that the sun cannot wake you. Some people say that you cannot ever catch up with sleep and if you miss sleep during the week, sleeping longer in the weekend will not reset the clock. I think those people are stupid! Get 8 hours every night if you can, but having a weekend sleep-in once in a while can do wonders for your state of mind. A healthy diet is critical too. Consult a nutritionist or educate yourself on healthy eating habits. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. Exercise. If you do not use your body, you will begin losing the use of your body as you get older. Nothing helps your mental and physical well being better than regular exercise. Hit the gym or your local yoga class a few times a week. Even taking a walk a few times a week can help. 2. Take Stock Of The Good Things In Your Life
You are luckier than you think. It is helpful to periodically take stock of all of the positive things in your life. Your family and friends may rank high on that list. Your health may as well. By focusing on the gifts you have received you will have perspective on the lemons that life throws at you. 3. Avoid Jumping To Negative Conclusions
It is human nature to walk around with a certain degree of anxiety or fear that others will think negatively of us. When we perceive negativity or distress in another person, it is easy to jump to the conclusion that they are unhappy with us or that we did something to cause them distress. Do not assume that. Find out if another person is truly unhappy with you or if there is something else that is bothering them. By doing so you will prevent misunderstandings and a rift in your relationship. Moreover, if you find out that something else is bothering them, maybe you can offer them comfort or help them with their problem. Simple empathy with the problems of another human being is good for others and good for you. 4. Everything is Gray
Our minds tend to want to think in black and white. But human motivations and behaviors are generally shaded in gray. Rather than attaching absolute qualities (good or bad) to people, recognize that human beings are very complicated. If someone does something that makes you happy, their behavior does not necessarily reflect on some absolute quality they cannot change. Instead, communicate with them to understand their motivations and see if you can work with them to develop a better relationship. 5. Avoid Negativity
Negativity can ruin your life. It affects your mood and your health. It poisons your relationship with other people. Recognize negativity in yourself and let it simply float away. If you find yourself drowning in negative thoughts, sometimes it helps to stop what you are doing and do something completely different. Go for a nice brisk walk through the park or go have some ice cream! A positive outlook can improve your life. A negative one never does. 6. Embrace the Healing Power of Touch
Human beings thrive on touch. Hugs will help your state of mind. Give and receive them often. You will help yourself and improve the lives of your friends and family. Get frequent massages, either from massage therapists or loved ones. It will improve your life. Better yet, get training and certification as a massage therapist. You will be the most popular person in your neighborhood! 7. You Are A Social Animal. Act Like It!
Human beings are social creatures. Invest in your social network and make spending time with friends and family a priority. Become involved in social activities that bring you in contact with new potential friends. There is nothing more detrimental to your mental health than being alone. 8. Help Yourself By Helping Others
It is hard to believe but the more you help other people the happier you will be. Try it! Lend emotional support to friends and family. Start there and then take it up a notch by volunteering for charitable organizations in your community. You will not believe how much purpose and happiness will come to your life if you spend time helping others. Keep these 8 tips in mind and you will see more happiness in your own life and you will enrich the lives of the people around. ** To comment on this article or to read comments about this article, go here.
About the Author:
Sylvie Strong writes on a number of issues of interest to her readers. She has recently become focused on energy efficient home improvements, and how they can save you money, help the environment and increase the comfort of your home. Click these links for more information on blackout blinds or energy efficient window curtains.
* Shhhhhh... The Secret Lost Footage! * The 20 minutes the producers didn't want you to see...
and why! The secret of The Secret revealed. This deleted footage was the original inspiration for the movie and the book, and is essential for getting "the secret" to work for YOU. I've seen it and studied it. Join me, Rick Schaefer, M.D., and learn the truth about this lost footage! | | ------------------------------------------------------------
*** Book Review: It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff - By Peter Walsh ***
------------------------------------------------------------ Veteran "organizational consultant," TV show host and author Walsh (How to Organize (Just About) Everything) has more ideas in his latest book on clutter management than the spare closet has junk, and, even better, it's organized, in-depth and entirely user-friendly. Part One examines the "Clutter Problem": how it happens, how it hampers and how to face it without excuses or discouragement. Part Two presents a step-by-step approach to "Putting Clutter in its Place," which begins with "surface clutter" and developing a household plan before moving on to the bulk of the book, a walkthrough of each room in the home. Also included are ideas for involving other family members, letters Walsh has received from viewers of his TLC show "Clean Sweep," vignettes illustrating how real people deal with common organizational challenges and plenty of charts, checklists and sidebars ("Clutter Quiz," "Yard Sale Planning") for added utility. Walsh is upbeat and funny throughout, treating the task at hand like "a thrilling archeological dig," a "positive and exciting" way to unlock your "ideal home" and "unearth those things that are most important in your life." Entertaining and instructive, this is one guidebook readers should place in their "keep" pile. Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
*****
The list price of this book is $15.00. To purchase it from Amazon.com at a price of $10.20, a 32% discount, go here.
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*** Brief News of the World ***
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Positive:
* 8-Year-Old Son Follows 'Last Lecture' Dad's Footsteps * The son of the late "Last Lecture" speaker Randy Pausch is following in his father's footsteps.
Almost two years after his father's death at age 47 from pancreatic cancer, 8-year-old Dylan Pausch is campaigning to raise awareness about the deadly disease, lobbying on Capitol Hill and walking the same halls as his father, the Carnegie Mellon professor who touched lives with his inspiring "Last Lecture." The elder Pausch pushed for increased pancreatic cancer funding in the final days before his death in July 2008. Go here for the complete news story. * Using the Internet to Save the Rainforest * Chief Almir Narayamoga Surui spins the globe in front of him past Copenhagen, Bristol, and Washington. He loves playing on Google Earth, and hopping from one continent to another. It's become something of an addiction. I ask him what interests him about Bristol. "I don't know," he replies. "I'm just looking." The virtual Earth in front of him continues turning, and finally reaches Brazil, and here the 35-year-old chief, who was born on the floor of a hut in the rainforest, zooms in on a large green triangle surrounded by brown, the outlines sharp as if drawn with a ruler. Go here for the complete news story. * Ultra-Runner With Prosthetic Leg Conquers Running World * Running is Amy Palmiero-Winters' constant. "Running was something that was always there," said Palmiero-Winters, who is missing her left leg below the knee and who is the first amputee to be named to the USA Track and Field team. Go here for the complete news story.
** For more positive news, please visit http://www.selfgrowth.com/news.html
Other:
* Mr. Moms Become More Common * Atlanta radio personality Jimmy Baron describes the events that left him unemployed as a perfect storm. In 2006, the radio station where he had worked for 13 years was bought and the new owner cut his pay by 60 percent. He quit and began looking for work. A few offers came in, but not what he was looking for. Then, the nation's economy tanked, and -- for the next three years -- all the offers dried up. Finally, late last year, he got the offer he was looking for as a morning DJ at a classic rock station in Atlanta. But on his first day back in the workforce, he realized there was a downside to the new job -- he hadn't been in the house when his son woke up, and he missed his old role of Mr. Mom. Go here for the complete news story. * California Bootcamps Gets Dogs and their Owners into Shape * With obesity rates on the rise among Americans and their pets, two Californian women have come up with an all-in-one solution -- a doggy bootcamp where dog owners and their canine friends work out together. Thank Dog Bootcamp is the nation's first outdoor fitness program where both humans and dogs get a full body workout while the pooches also learn basic obedience skills. Go here for the complete news story. * Boy's Eyesight Saved By Playing Videogames * Any kid would like this cure. The Daily Mail is reporting a daily dose of videogames saved the eyesight of a 6-year-old boy. Since the age of 4, Ben Michaels suffered from a condition called amblyopia, or severe lazy eye syndrome, which caused the vision in his right eye to gradually decrease. Had it gone untreated, Ben could have lost his sight permanently. Go here for the complete news story.
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